A Rewritten Poem

A Student Explains Why She Dislikes St. Olaf 
Originally by Barbara Ras
Rewritten by Megan Danielson and Shelby Miner

Because leaves on the ground are orange and red, colors
anyone can dislike, even against the green
of the grass, where they say winter is coming, oh no snow,
because on a small campus there is nowhere to hide,
it's Boe Chapel, the Caff,
the hubbub in the bathroom when all the showers are full,
because I don’t have time for breakfast in the morning,
because there's something about the sound of a creepy organ in the church at night and the dream of a bed we won’t fall out of
that reminds me this is education, because of the simple pleasure
of having a microwave is not allowed, because sometimes meat tastes better than the vegan option,
because of hauling books to class
is as good as it gets when it’s raining and snowing and you have to walk
all the way to Old Main,
because one can actually only be so environmentally friendly
when you must empty your own recycling bin always,
because you can study forever and it actually might kill you,
because towns, cities, we’d just like a real one
because the school is right next to the Malt-O-Meal factory
and it smells like oatmeal which is incredibly unfortunate without
the time for breakfast, as we mentioned earlier, just a lot of homework,
an inconvenient blog, because I'm lost deep within the library
and can’t find my way out,
because even when my academic advisor cried
“I don’t know what you should take!”
because these people
come from the hill.